Debt can be a train coming down the track

If I stand somewhere on a rail track, with my back to the tunnel, the dread of a train will be all consuming. Why would you not look to see if the train was coming?

This is what debtors do, and in fact some even lie down on the tracks telling everyone who passes that it is a sunny day.

The dread of the debts coming our way is far worse than the bills themselves. If we actually know what we owe and when we'll have to pay, we can do something about it. You might not be able to totally repair the damage but you can limit it. You can also put the anxiety about the debt into a box which is only opened for 20 minutes a day.

Christmas is over and so is the fantasy that most of us experienced. I used to have the most terrible fantasy hangover coming up in the New Year.

The gift giving, the parties, the new clothes. No one wants to write down what they spend around this time of year. You don’t remember, do you? You don’t remember what you spent and when? In the throws of the bright lights and the excitement we lose all logic.

Why didn't listen to The Debtologist and have a plan? Why didn't I write down what I spent?

Well let’s start off assuming you haven’t. All is not lost. It feels horrible – the glitter still in you hair and the fairy still on the tree and now bloody reality is coming to your door. Write down anything you can remember spending: whether it was that extra bottle of champagne or the fabulous wrapping paper that got torn apart in seconds.

Go back to six weeks before Christmas if you are starting from scratch. Look at any receipts you might have kept, and get a list from the taxi company and the bank of what you spent.

Don’t do any more that twenty minutes or it really will be miserable. Start with that and write it down in a notebook, a diary or even on your phone.

There is something very basic that happens to our brains when we stress. We acknowledge the stress and make it worse. It creates a tiny groove that gets bigger the longer we do it. So writing what we have spent, down in a notebook, causes us stress.

But we have to force ourselves to do it. Stick to 20 minutes a day, maximum, but do it every day. It's only twenty minutes and then we can get back to eating Christmas dinner leftovers. Slowly, the memory changes over from unhappiness to one of light spirited ease.

Turning my back on the oncoming train won't stop it coming, but I can make a small step in the right direction and stop a disaster.

I have eaten way too much, I have given some lovely presents and I'm taking a pause before the final push of New Year for celebrations. In that pause, I am writing down what I have spent this last week. I have got into the habit over the last few years so its easier, even though the temptation is still there to get onto the sales instead.